Tag Archives: cats suck

I used to like cats

I’m in Florida until Tuesday babysitting my aunt’s cats. Did you know cats are disgusting creatures? They pee on beds and track poop around the house and smell just awful. They steal turkey sandwiches and hiss at ladies when ladies do nice things for them. They make ladies miss the birth of their first nephew, too — an extra bastardly move.

They also rape arms.

They sometimes trip mothers, too.